The Decoy Bride (2011)

dir. Sheree Folkson

It is difficult to fathom what talented people like Kelly McDonald, David Tennant, Alice Eve, and Dylan Moran are doing in The Decoy Bride. They’re not acting – no one really does that in this film. The story follows a Scottish woman who stands in for a Hollywood celebrity at her wedding, to throw off the press – and in an utterly shocking turn of events, starts to fall for the groom herself. The confused tone of the film is best summed up by the wise musings of the homely old man the protagonists run into: “When God made time, he made plenty of it. When God made twine, he made balls of it.” In other words, it means absolutely nothing and everything would have been better if it just wasn’t expressed at all.

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