Red Riding Hood (2011)

dir. Catherine Hardwicke

In a twist surprising no one, the director of Twilight brings us an adaptation of a fairy tale that’s supposed to be dark and brooding, but is instead just pretty goofy. So much doom and gloom, with murder and imprisonment and torture devices. But it’s hard to take the grimness fully seriously when we’re also grappling with all the rules around werewolves: if you kill a werewolf, it’ll revert to its human form, and if a human is bitten by a werewolf they’ll also become a wolf, but only if it’s Blood Week, and sometimes people can understand a wolf even if they’re not a wolf themselves, but it depends on whether the curse has been cast, blah blah blah. Being dead serious about something so stupid just cannot work; it’s remarkable the actors manage to keep such monotonous straight faces throughout.

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