dir. Victor Salva
Easily the most terrifying thing about Jeepers Creepers is the notion that it’s meant to be taken even remotely seriously. Siblings Trish (a terrible Gina Philips) and Darry (an even worse Justin Long) find themselves stalked by a sinister supernatural entity which consumes its victim’s body parts. The plot is primarily propelled forward by Trish and Darry’s predilection for always making the most idiotic, ill-advised, downright suicidal decision in any given situation, whether that’s crawling into eerie rat-filled pipes, or standing and staring at their pursuer, wide-eyed and slack-jawed, for several minutes at a time instead of just fleeing for their lives. Contrived narrative elements – like how the monster emerges for twenty-three days every twenty-three years, or the simple fact of the eponymous song being shoehorned in periodically in a desperate bid to justify the movie’s title – contribute to the general sense that this is a film which has absolutely no idea what it’s doing, but hopes for the best anyway. The final product falls far short of its hopes.