The Core (2003)

dir. Jon Amiel

The premise of The Core is so profoundly stupid that it’s hard not to laugh. The liquid outer core of the Earth has stopped spinning, so a team of hero scientists needs to drill down to the centre of the planet and set off some nuclear bombs to restore rotation. Incredibly convenient plot elements include the adverse impact of the ceased rotation to only affect a few places sometimes, while our heroes can continue their very important science unimpeded, almost as if there’s not actually an impending disaster at all. Of course our heroes are American, with no other country in The Core able to even discern what the problem is, let alone contribute to a solution. The solution is based on “unobtanium”, which in this movie signifies a material which is impervious to the heat at the centre of the Earth. So a couple of our intrepid scientists even manage to return home at the end. Even allowing for significant suspension of disbelief, The Core doesn’t even bother to do the barest research before plunging into insanity – for example, the team is logged as having travelled over 2,000 miles into the planet to reach the core, even though the distance between the Earth’s surface and its core is 1,800 miles. The Core is utterly stupid from start to finish, but with a premise like that, it was always going to be.

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