New Year’s Eve (2011)

dir. Garry Marshall

Like Valentine’s Day, New Year’s Eve is another film where Garry Marshall follows around a bunch of insipid nobodies in an attempt to rip off Love Actually. It’s very difficult to understand why anyone would want to rip off Love Actually to begin with, but here we are. This one really tries to hammer in the sentimentality: we see a nurse video calling her husband deployed in Afghanistan; a burgeoning teen romance; and of course, a cancer patient who just wants to see that New Year’s Eve ball drop one more time. All the characters are basically copy-pastes of each other, because despite their different ages, sexes and (occasionally) races they’re all so bland that there aren’t many distinctions to draw between them. New Year’s Eve was released in 2011, and it can’t have felt like a good omen for 2012.

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